Hello. My name is Dexxe, I have a green boil on my bum and graduated from college last year. I am interested in starting my career with your company.

Tell us what you know about this company.

Well. Um. Eh um. Shit. It pays well?

Yes, guys. Just failed another job interview. But after you miss out on a couple of them, you start to get the hang of it. Especially if you comfort yourself with the mantra:

Ka job si yako si yako.

Implying, somewhat, that you failed the interview because The Forces That Be know with absolute certainty that the job was really not suited for you. If it were, even with your lack of preparedness or with no relevant education or experience, you would still have it.

In high school I remember watching an Asian action flick that was filled with so much lies that I have to see it again. Problem is, I dunno the title. All I remember is one scene that I am going to summarize here and hope one of you guys can tell me which one it is.

I remember a tall chick (no ass no tits. That’s why I remember it was an Asian movie) dressed in a tight white pleather pant suit. She is the protagonist of the movie just in case the white-clad did not hint that enough. She catwalks into a room with the antagonist (hereby referred to as Bad Guy from now on), sits across him, takes off her shades and places them on the table.

Bad Guy talks. She talks. Bad Guy talks. She talks. Bad Guy looks worried. Bodyguards become alert.

I am not even sure whether the movie was in English because I was watching it while standing on a table at the end of a very huge dining hall. Standing that far, it was even a wonder that I saw what was happening at the screen. Since I could not hear anything in all these Entertainment Days I was just watching out for fight scenes and steamy ones. We hated movies with a lot of taking, as you can imagine.

Bad Guy, realizes the threat is real, presses a button and a bullet-proof screen appears between him and her. She starts kicking the asses of the guards behind her and during one of her maneuvers she does half a back flip and lands on the ceiling. Yes. She lands on the goddamn ceiling. She is now upside down with her six-inch stiletto heel deeply embedded into the ceiling. Hanging by one heel like a chandelier and comfortable enough to continue shooting guys. Bullets are spewed all round like she was a smoke detector sprinkler. PEW! PEW! PEW!

She stays in this bat-like position for a while. Until all the guards are dead I think. Then plucks out the foot from the ceiling and land with her feet on the floor. Miaow!

Bad Guy is stunned but smiles grimly because of the safety of the bullet proof glass between them.

‘Muhahaha. Yu a no kiro me!’

But before the bastard could finish basking in his improvised safety, the chick clicks a button and suddenly Bad Guy’s side of the glass starts filling up with smoke. He looks down to find the source: the shades this chick had placed on the table. During the glassy separation they had been left on his side.

Choke choke cough choke. It’s a poisonous gas. He dies.

Then the chick goes out of the office to assassin some more ass.

Has anyone seen this movie? What’s its title? And please don’t be those assholes that are quick to say ‘Google is your friend’. Just say you don’t know or you don’t want to share your knowledge. I have tried all the search terms I could think of and keep ending at Naked Weapon which has no such scene (but has some disturbingly steamy ones). If you are an expert on Googling please do it for me and tag me the results. (Tag me the results? That doesn’t sound right.)

PS: The interview part and the movie part are not related. At all. Lest you become confused.

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