After months of fast foods and microwavable delicacies, I finally decided to give cooking a go. My mind was ready. My stomach was ready. No actually, I am broke. If I don’t stop buying canned food daily I just might not make it through the summer.
After months of mentally preparing myself, I attempt to cook something real. Saik saik. pic.twitter.com/18vFY8HQuN
— Dexxe (@Dexxe) June 24, 2015
I decided to stream my cooking activities on Twitter. Because what are you going to do when the food manual tells you ‘and let it boil for 5 minutes‘? Just stand there and wait? I revised the instructions to ‘and let it boil for 15 minutes as you tweet. You have been a good boy for not tweeting for a week and I the cook book think you deserve it.’ The meal I decided to go with was green grams aka ndengu. For some strange reason I was craving ndengu ever since I posted my Sense8 thing. Weird. The cooking went very well. As was evident from the mentions I got on Twitter. My followers had nothing but praises. I was called husband material. Some even proposed to marry me. Both men and women.
Some asked if it tasted as good as it looked, because it look like unicorn food – heavenly.
Hell, some even asked if they could get a and my complete recipe.
Words like Ramsay Gordon, master, unbelivable, Jesus Christ were used.
What most found refreshingly innovative was the fact that I was putting potatoes in my ndengu.
@Dexxe why you doing this?? Warus in ndengs?
— Qetesh (@jackiewamwas) June 24, 2015
Apparently not many have tried this combo. It’s too bad they didn’t have an awesome aunt like mine. An aunt who taught us to boil everthing, preferably in one pot. All because a witchdoctor on FamilyTV said boiling prepares us better for the Kingdom of Heaven. These followers didn’t even know that I had taken a shortct in making that stew. I just used green grams and potatoes. The Aunt would have put in pumpkin, githeri, yams, these purple tubers (I forget the name) and rice. I will share this recipe with you guys soon. It is hard to give this kind of food an accurate name so my sister calls it Mashakura. She is the one in charge of naming.
Oh by the way, I forgot to mention the favoirites ingredient of my single parent, light skin Kikuyu aunt… CABBAGES. Hey, those stereotypes have to based on something, right?
Kuzo hated the cabbages because ‘zinajaza magoti maji‘. Which translated means they fill up your knees with water. What I understood from this was that cabbages help in over production of synoptic fluids in one’s joints. That is, until I joined Twitter and really understood his euphemism.
Anyway, the love got from all those thousands of random strangers has inspired me to turn this blog from a fashion blog to a food blog.I have found my niche guys. I will share all I can with the world so that people can know of such finger-licking delights such as
2.Supu ya Malenge
3.Nyama ya Mbwa
4.Matope ya Cabbage
7.Minji za Family Reunion
8.Hizi ni Carrot ama Ngandamia?
9. Chapo za Wageni
5. Mchele Refu (aka spaghetti)
10. Unamaanisha nini chakula haitoshi? Ongeza cabbage.
With such a nutritious and all rounded array of boilery I don’t even know why I thought I had an eating disorder.