I am a great fan of the Need For Speed franchise particularly the Most Wanted and Carbon video games. The new ones do not play on this computer, because of the little ram, slow processor and so and so. One thing I noticed in Carbon is the way the cars are differentiated, There are the exotics: Merc, M3, DB. Then the Muscle: Corvette, Viper, SRT8. And Finally the tuners: Skyline, Evo, R8. That is how they divided them but the way I saw it was American muscles, European Exotics and Japanese Tuners.

American cars suck. They are very bad. I am dissing them and yet I do not have a car of any type to my name. The closest I am to having a car is owning a Drivers Licence, which is either expired, or lost. Probably both. But the fact that I do not drive shit does not make them American junks any better, anymore than  not throwing away food helps the kids that starve to death.

I have many reasons why I hate them, partly because my dad hates them, partly because Jeremy Clarkson hates them but mainly because Americans themselves hate them. Of course they do not show it directly but its very clear. Look at music videos for instance. Snoop in his videos has them Chevys riding high boy Chevy riding high boy. These cars are souped up beyond recognition. The wheel arch is restructured to fit 26 inch rims, the engine is changed to increase horsepower! Spoilers installed to make noise. The ride is lowered because they have good roads. The steering wheel is pilotized to keep the I- Wanna-Be-A-Pilot dream alive. Skirts everyfuckingwhere. The final product is so unrecognisable that you would think its a new make of a vehicle. And that is my beef right there. The car looks good, no doubt, but only because you have changed everything! Its as if they imply that they cannot function without interference by West Coast Customs. That stock is whack!

If you see them American hiphoppers with European cars however, different story completely. If its Rick Ross next to that Maybach, you know its a Maybach because they have not changed anything, not even the paint! They use the ride just the way they got it. Any upgrades they need to add (which is probably just the paint because lets face it, the car has everything) you call the HQ and they come pick up the car and go and rework it to your perfection!

You may say that I just compared a luxury car with a normal one so let me use an American luxury car that appears mostly on their videos. Please wait as I think of one …..You may want to go paint your neighbourhood as you wait cos this might take a while! Thinking. Thinking…thinking…Error. No car comes to mind. If you had the sudden retarded urge to scream Chrysler 300 at me. I would let you know that they classify that as a muscle car. To me the 300 is too big a car to be a muscle but then again, they needed to make a car that an average American would fit in.

So maybe I choose a normal European car that can compare to a normal American car? The Jaguar to the Ford? Beamer to the Lincoln maybe? The Merc to the um…, to the um… Maybe you help me out? A list of American cars that match Europeans ones. Because it is hard to see American cars anywhere.

Forget the luxuries lets go to the SUVs. If you were to compare the best of both worlds so to speak, what would you pick for the SUV category. From Europe I would go for the Range Rover Sport. Not sure it is the best of Europe but just because I freaking love it. For the US, I am not sure…The Cadillac Escalade? Or the GMC ? Ohh wait what about the Hummer!? I am sure that was removed from the lorry category. Which among the three is the best American SUV? I am not sure which to pick because they all suck the same so I will pick the first two. GMC and Escalade Vs The Range! For starters. The Range costs the price of both of them combined! Looks way better. Sounds way better. And so and so. So given for free, I would take one Range instead of the two. As long as the fuel is always for free of course because my goodness! The Range is an gasoholic! Turning on the ignition takes a litre of petrol! That is a car you do not want to get stuck in traffic with.

So basically what I am saying is Americans tell me they can’t have good cars that can work without…

*This is from my Blogger drafts that I did in 2011. I was looking for a draft that I lost in one of these many accounts of mine when I came across this. I found out appropriate to post it because I watched the Need For Speed movie and I had forgotten all about this. I could not find a part 2 (probably why I quit). And I am in no hurry of improving the grammar/spelling.  I can see somewhere where I said the spoiler is for making noise but I will still not change that. I am being proud of my mistakes. Hashtag  PostYourDrafts

One Response to “EXOTICS vs MUSCLES vs TUNERS part 1”

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